Re: The Complaints Thread >:(

by **Kathryn Lacey** Sat Mar 12, 2011 12:09 am

I don't really know just how severe it is. I mean, I've never really seen a scale by which to base it, you know?

by The Melancholy Spirit Sat Mar 12, 2011 12:09 am

Haha, yeah. That would be a rather interesting scale though.

by Lyonesse Sat Mar 12, 2011 4:28 am

Spoiler tagged for foul, drunken language.

Spoiler:

*Angry Charlie Sheen-esque rant over for now.*

by Skitzo-phrenick Sat Mar 12, 2011 1:01 pm

Lyonesse, you're righteous fury was both intimidating and awe-inspiring. Seriously, I want to be your personal cheerleader now.

I actually didn't want to post in here about this, but it's getting frustrating only because I'm just being nosy and worried and.... curious I guess.

Anyway, my brother's been having problems at the naval academy lately. He was planning to travel to Russia over spring break and was really all set up for it. Then something happend. I have no idea what this something is, but my brother called my dad last week to talk about it and from what I heard over the phone my brother got in trouble for something and I'm thinking it may have something to do with alcohol because I remember my dad mentioning the fact that he turned 21... which is the only thing that relates.

Naturally I was curious when I heard them talking but my brother called for my dad not for me and if he wanted to talk to me about it he would tell me when he's ready. I had and still have no reason to push him and to be honest I really don't want to either. Especially if it's something serious that actually happened.

Well anyway things just got worse. While I was spending the night at my friend's house yesterday I got a facebook status on my phone from him saying the following:

"Reduction in rank for 3 months, 90 demerits, 45 days restriction, and probably still going to lose my trip to Russia. This sucks."

I really REALLY want to be a comforting arm to my brother but it sucks that he's in Annapolis and I really can't do anything other than pretend everything is okay. And it's even harder to accept that something like this is happening and I know that I'm the only person in the immediate family who doesn't know about it. I truly want him to be okay and I hope he still gets his trip to Russia (even though I extremely doubt that's going to happen now), but I honestly just don't know how to approach this situation.

It just sucks when you can't do anything for people that matter to you.

by Lara Sun Mar 13, 2011 9:20 pm

Have you tried talking to him at all, Skitz? Not necessarily about what's wrong, but just in-general talking? Sometimes that's all it takes to get someone to open up to you.

My complaint isn't nearly as bad, I'm just annoyed about it. I lost my phone at a point so-far undetermined yesterday and didn't notice till around 2 in the morning, when I was packing for school and wanted to plug it in. Tore apart the entire house and called every place I had been in the morning but no one had seen it (or turned it in).

I went back to school today with my sister's old phone and a new SIM card, which requires all new numbers. =/ I mean, I'm really glad that I have a phone at all but I'm really annoyed that I couldn't find mine at all.

And on top of that, I had to send my laptop in for repairs over spring break because one of my friends was an idiot and tripped over the cord, causing the laptop to fall and the wireless/card reader section to collapse in on itself. Usable, but wifi is kind of a necessity at school, so it needed fixing. They said it would take two weeks. I was home for one. So I'm currently on my dad's old laptop, which again, I'm extremely grateful for, but I'm still peeved about how my old one got broken...

by Skitzo-phrenick Sun Mar 13, 2011 10:25 pm

Yeah, we've been talking through email and facebook, and those are the only medium I can manage to talk to him through unless he calls me. When I realized something happened I tried to get more in touch with him, but it's kind of hard when he's limiting conversation to only a few things.

by **Fate Flyer** Thu Mar 17, 2011 5:04 pm

There's so much going on in my life right now that's stressing me out. I've been trying to find a job back where I used to live so that I can move back ASAP, but I can't even find a simple minimum wage, part-time job there! It's ridiculous, and it's the cause of the biggest stress in my life, since not only is it infuriating and annoying, not to mention makes me feel pretty worthless that someone with a Bachelor's degree can't find a job that a high schooler could do, but it also means I'm forced to endure living 3 hours away in the suburbs of Chicago with my ex and having to drive every weekend, spend a lot of money on gas and only get to see my boyfriend for a short period of time before coming back. In addition, I'm having problems at work with a coworker who won't leave me alone, not to mention all the customers who come in and are really irritating and harass me. I just need to get out of here! I am completely desperate.

What's also annoying is that I have almost no free time right now. I'm working full-time and don't get home till 10:00 PM, and then I got to bed at 11:00. The only time I get is on the weekends, and they go by ridiculously fast. I need to find time to not only find a job, but also pack everything at my current place so that I'll be ready to move at the drop of a hat, which will hopefully be dropping soon.

by Lara Sun Mar 20, 2011 2:11 am

People seriously need to learn to grow up and realize that the world does not revolve them, that they are more than capable of sharing the blame, rather than throwing it at someone else. Like me. Every time.

by **Silvan Arrow** Sun Mar 20, 2011 3:35 pm

I hate coming back to this place of confusion, where emotion and logic war with each other in my soul and are only confounded by so many conflicting opinions from people I talk to for advice. I don't need these emotional, personal, and relationship (or lack thereof) issues when I've got so much going on with grad school and planning thesis work.

I got into one of those moods yesterday where I had to rant-write on my computer, and I came up with this to describe my relationship with someone who is very important to me and who was just in town visiting. I don't know which is worse: not knowing his feelings or realizing that we have similar feelings but are hesitant to act on them due to distance. Anyway, I was afraid this little piece of writing would freak some people out if I posted it on Facebook because it's a lot of raw emotions. But since we are all a literate community of writers and I just feel the need to share it, I figured I'd post it here and see what you all thought. Yes, it is about a real person in my life, but it's also meant to be a little abstract.

How did I come to this place again? I once bid you farewell and took away a whole clay cistern filled with emotions as sweet as fine wine. But as time passed, I selfishly hid and hoarded these emotions as time, distance, and silence turned the wine into sour vinegar and trickled through holes in the cistern, carved from the clay by the acid of my emotions. The feel of your touch and the sound of your voice temporarily patched these holes while I poured more and more of myself – my blood, my tears, my prayers – into the cistern to try and refill it.

But even the deepest of wells reaches its bottom. My heart was beating, but no blood flowed through my veins. The hollow, dry sound of its dying cadence echoed through my skull and reverberated in my soul. The holes in the cistern widened faster than they could be repaired, until it finally ran dry because I had nothing left to sate its appetite. Gladly I threw the cistern to the ground and listened with satisfaction to the sound of its shattering. I washed my hands of the dust and walked away, fully intent on never holding that cistern again.

And yet, here I am again. You have handed me a brand new cistern, filled, overflowing even, with sweeter wine than before. The clay is stronger, as though glazed and hardened in the fires of a kiln, but it is still clay nonetheless. I cherish and cling to this cistern, savoring the bouquet of the wine and occasionally sipping its nectar so that I might relive the buzz of those memories and emotions. But as I gaze into the cistern, I already see the cracks forming. The wine at the bottom has already started to turn to vinegar and eat through the glaze to form cracks in the clay. I watch helplessly in horror as my fingertips feel the droplets of vinegar starting to leech through those cracks.

Are we doomed to repeat this cycle over and over? Will you wait until I have gone through the valleys and shadows needed to break this cistern as well only to hand me another one? Or will you share your emotions and essence with me so that I do not run dry again?

Perhaps one day, instead of clay, I will hold a cistern made of steel that has been forged and tempered in the fires and gilded with the beauty of gold. And perhaps I will exchange that cistern for a goblet so that we may both share in the wine that will never again turn to vinegar.

by **Kalon Ordona II** Wed Mar 23, 2011 7:14 pm

*sniff* I appreciate the fine and touching writing almost as much as I feel for your plight. Sad

*hug*
I don't know enough about the situation to offer any attempt at specific advice. But you know how they always say to follow your heart? That's true, but the heart doesn't always know best. Sometimes the head is worth listening to as well, once in a while. I guess that's all I've got: listen to both. If they conflict, try to sway one toward the other rather than tearing them apart. In other words, try to choose a path and follow it with your heart and your head, without looking back. Wine drunk is sweet; wine unopened is sweeter. Wine opened and undrunk sours. The vinegar, I think, is doubt and indecision.

by Guest Thu Mar 24, 2011 4:33 pm

My 15 year old brother keeps sending me messages on Facebook asking me to teach him how to draw. I've been posting my comics on FB since I started making them and he REALLY wants to draw like I do.

I severely dislike teaching anything but especially drawing - for some people it's just a particular way of seeing things and I get frustrated when trying to articulate something that's like reading to me. "What do you mean you don't understand? Shapes! Everything is shapes! Make your hand do what you see and don't let it draw lines that aren't there!"

I tried to be supportive and honest by explaining to him that I don't know how to teach him to do that and gave him some general advice - like draw from life, keep practicing, try and draw exactly what you see and not how you think it's supposed to look, try and see everything in lines and shapes, etc. He seemed to take the hint and thanked me for the advice.

Then today he sends me a message asking me specifically "How do u start to draw your people from whay back when and what do you do when you draw the circle for the head."

...

um, you draw a circle for the head. That's how. Seriously.

I'm growing irritated and feeling conflicted. I have no idea what to tell him now without sounding like a bitch. Sad

by Skitzo-phrenick Thu Mar 24, 2011 4:48 pm

Give him some books?

Thankfully I don't have this problem but when it comes to wanting to be able to draw or giving drawing tips. I tell the person to draw something for me first and I'll critique it that way. It's pretty much impossible to give advice when different people have their strengths and weaknesses. So you have to figure out what they've got on hand at first and then start from there. I'd just focus on things one drawing at a time.

Also it would be better if you suggest to him to draw something he likes. Like say he likes a comic page of yours. Suggest that he try to copy them without tracing. Really an artist learns A LOT from that alone. I know I did.

by Guest Thu Mar 24, 2011 5:32 pm

Thanks, Skitz. I'll try that - it'll definitely make things easier to explain.

by **Kalon Ordona II** Thu Mar 24, 2011 6:35 pm

Skitzo beat me to it. Books. Go to your local library, head to non-fiction, and look in the 741.5's.
Trust me, it'll be like Christmas. ^_^

by **Gadreille** Thu Mar 24, 2011 9:12 pm

My back hurts...I forgot how much standing in one place for hours at at time can hurt. And...I wish for once I had a reliable babysitter. Or hell, a babysitter. I don't know anyone willing to babysit that isn't family...which obviously doesn't work when I need a babysitter for a family event.

by **Kalon Ordona II** Thu Mar 24, 2011 9:56 pm

Awwww. I'm sure we'd all love to babysit Taeo. But we're all far away. Sad

by **Kathryn Lacey** Thu Mar 24, 2011 11:53 pm

Ugh... I hate trying to teach people. If they don't understand something the first way I explain it, I'm never certain how to make them understand with a different explanation, so I can understand your reluctance, Time. I hope others' advice will help you help your brother.

Ryona, I can definitely understand the standing in one place thing. As a cashier, it's pretty much all I do. Lately, I've been doing other things to help get ready for the new store opening, but I'll be right back to it for a week before I move, and it's going to suck.

I hope you can get a babysitter on whom you can rely. Have you tried looking online? They have some websites where you can find sitters.

I'm actually going to complain about FoG right now... I mean, for the most part, I love this site, and for the most part, the people are pretty great... However, it seems like people post over one another constantly. Like... someone will post something, and the next day ((or even just a few hours later)), another person will post their own thing without even bothering to say two words about the post the person above them made. It's ridiculous, and it's rude. Obviously, if a person says, "Don't bother responding to this. I'm just saying something for my own mental stability." it's not a big deal, but if they don't write that in their post, it means they probably want someone to respond to it.

I dislike that rude people seem to be active participants on this site. I mean, duh, there are exceptions, but those exceptions seem too few and far between. =\

by **Gadreille** Fri Mar 25, 2011 1:19 am

You know, I am one of those rude people. I know I do that, because I pop on here and want to say something like it's my facebook update or something. I'd like to apologize for that, I can't say I won't still do it, but I'll try and do it less.

by **Silvan Arrow** Fri Mar 25, 2011 7:47 am

I'm sorry, too. I'm sure I've probably done that at some point or another, especially when I post something on here and expect someone to comment/offer advice when I don't do the same for others. It's not right or fair to anyone else. Thank you for being a gut check and calling us on this, Kathryn. I'll definitely try to do better.

by **Kathryn Lacey** Fri Mar 25, 2011 2:13 pm

I think it's wonderful that people want to step up and at least try to be better about responding to people rather than just posting over them. It means that FoG may have a bright future in people becoming more courteous. ^^_^^

by **Silvan Arrow** Wed Mar 30, 2011 8:18 pm

Well, I suppose I don't really have a right to ask for sympathy or input considering I haven't been the best at offering it to FoGgers in the past, but I just need to rant this out of my system.

So my week just pretty much crashed and burned all in one fell swoop. My crush was in town a few weeks ago for his aunt's memorial service, and that weekend rekindled a lot of old feelings and sparked ones that I didn't realize he had had for a long time. Well, he was supposed to come visit me this weekend, and I had planned all sorts of fun stuff to do, like bringing him swing dancing and renting one of my lab's sea kayaks for the day. My week has honestly been hell with all the work I've had, so looking forward to him coming was the only thing making it tolerable. Well, he called me after I got done teaching my two undergrad labs back to back, only to explain how he just got royally screwed over by his professors and classmates and now has a bunch more work piled on for his classes. In addition, his mom also called today and needs him to come home for the weekend to move/organize stuff because people are coming to work on her house and repair some flood damage. We're both devastated, and now I'm just sitting in my room with a major presentation tomorrow, but I'm too emotionally numb to even think about it right now. We're hoping that I'll be able to come see him for a few days after my exams and before my summer field season starts, but that's still up in the air too. And now I'm also scared to try and hope for something like that so far in advance, because what if that fails too? Then I'll just be even more devastated because I would have been looking forward to it for nearly a month instead of a couple weeks.

I can't even process this right now. Part of me wants to cry, part of me is just numb, and another part just wants to bury myself in work so I don't think about it. I don't know how I'm gonna be able to practice my presentation tonight when I can't think even think straight.

Looks like my weekend will consist of sitting at home grading my students' papers nonstop. What joy...

by wakeangel Wed Mar 30, 2011 8:36 pm

~offers Silvan a comforting hug~
I know we haven't talked much, but I also know the sheer suckitude of long distance relationships, I've been there. I'm sorry you're hurting, and I wish there was something I could say to make it better. Just know that we all care about you, and we'll be here to listen any time you need to vent.

by **Silvan Arrow** Wed Mar 30, 2011 9:03 pm

Thanks, wakeangel. I mean, we're not in an official relationship or anything, but the mutual feelings are definitely there. He just doesn't want to hurt me by rushing into a relationship, so we're taking things slowly and seeing where it goes. In the meantime, he doesn't want me to live my life on his account and avoid seeing other people. It's just that there's no one else right now who holds my heart like he does. But yeah, even long distance friendships suck big time...

by **Kalon Ordona II** Wed Mar 30, 2011 10:30 pm

That's too bad, Silvan. Sad

Well, we can't do much, but at least we can be here for you. Pretty much what Wakeangel said. Smile

~ hug ~

by **Silvan Arrow** Wed Mar 30, 2011 10:46 pm

Thanks, Kalon. I really appreciate the kind words ^_^. It'll probably hurt for a while, but the support really helps. I'm actually rather overwhelmed. Friends in grad school, back home, and here at FoG have practically rallied to offer support and encouragement because they knew how excited I was. Please know that I am truly honored that people care so much.

by The Melancholy Spirit Fri Apr 01, 2011 11:24 pm

I know, I'm being an ass and not commenting to anything anyone else has complained about. Sorry about that, and for the petty complaint inbound. First off, anyone who thinks they want naturally curly hair, you're an idiot. Secondly... with all the ridiculous harsh chemicals in damn near everything to control frizzy hair, and the fact that mine looks absolutely horrible if I try to leave it down... I'm most likely just going to have to cut it all off.

by **Fate Flyer** Sat Apr 02, 2011 12:43 am

I'm feeling down...

I also had to work an extra hour today, since people kept coming in to our restaurant after close. I didn't get home till 11:30 at night. I'm so beat. I'm not a waitress, but I had to carry out with a lot of waitressing duties in order to help out. I don't blame the waitresses -- it's not their fault we got more people than our tiny sushi restaurant can handle. It is rude though when people come in right before close and ask if we can still seat them, saying they know that we close in a few minutes. -_- My boss can be too nice.

by **Silvan Arrow** Sat Apr 02, 2011 1:11 am

Melancholy: I feel your pain with the frizzy hair. Mine has just enough natural curl to be obnoxious without actually looking nice. I have to spend an hour on it if I want to wear it down without it looking like crap. I hope you don't have to resort to cutting it all off if that's not what you want, but if you do, at least you know it'll grow back eventually.

Fate: I'm sorry that happened to you. My internship partner and I had similar issues with people trying to come into the herpetarium right before closing. I hope you can get some rest and feel better tomorrow. Do you have time off this weekend to do something fun?

For my own life, I've been feeling down today as well. It sucks when I think that I could be spending time with my friend if circumstances hadn't forced him to cancel his trip. On one hand, I'll definitely get more work done, but I would take the trade-off and get a little behind any day.

by **Kalon Ordona II** Sat Apr 02, 2011 4:00 am

Everybody seems to come during the last five minutes before closing at the library, too. <.<

by Guest Sat Apr 02, 2011 2:26 pm

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