Lucian's advice for life.

[Lucian 'The Wolf' Harth]

SO! Apparently I'm really good at helping people with their problems. I have two friends that call me whenever they need someone to talk to and several more that are always saying 'I should have listened to you man. Then I wouldn't be in this situation.' So, I thought I'd put this statement to the test and make a thread about it. Good idea eh? I'll be answering your questions and listening to your feedback. Got something you wanna talk about but don't want to post it in the public forum? Feel free to PM me and we'll talk about it in privacy, but post your feedback in the thread!

So that's how this is going to work. Now then, Lucian is currently in. How may I be of service?

[Gadreille]

Usually I play the same role as you do, Lucian. I'd often thought of starting one of these threads, and in an effort to get yours going, I seek advice for an issue of my own:

I went to school and graduated with a BA while taking care of a child and running a home business. Due to the economy, I cannot seem to get hired anywhere. I know there is no advice on earth that hasn't already given on this subject, these is merely back story to explain where I come from.

Essentially, I like to work hard. I prepared myself both physically and mentally for a successful life of work and raising children. Now I've found myself stuck at home, in my grandparents house, only having to care for my one child and keep my home business (AVON) running.

I am not passionate about AVON, I just sell it to friends and family to make a bit of cash while fervently looking for work (which, obviously, I have not yet found). My problem is, I am often bored. I have no car to go out with, no money to spend if I could go out, and the house I live in is far away from everything (except a small park, which frequently has questionable characters hanging out there).

I take care of my son, I clean the house, I run errands for and with my grandparents, I make as many visits to my parents as I can, I roleplay for fun, I walk to the park with Taeo when I can, bike when I can, hell I even signed up and finished NaNaWriMo just to busy myself. I invite friends over whenever I can, but mostly they don't go out except at night and by then I'm usually worn out from my busy (but mundane) daily tasks. BUT I AM STILL BORED!

What can I do to increase happiness in my life while stuck at home? I understand that few people have sympathy for me because they wish they could do the same. However, like I explained above, I was programmed to work hard, not sit about and be lazy. I find that not having a career or schooling to concentrate on has left me feeling lethargic, and I fight it by busying myself but its there none the less. What do I do?

[Lucian 'The Wolf' Harth]

Well it sounds like you're in the same situation I was in a few months back before I found my current job. You make enough to support yourself and your child, and your grandparents don't seem to mind helping you out. I'm sure most everyone out there has been in this situation at one time or another. So, here is my advice to you.

You have a good education and yeah you definitely have what it takes to get a great career, but in the mean time you need a little something to keep you occupied and give you a little play money on the side. Get a part time job as a waitress or something in retail, there's nothing wrong with settling for a small job while you wait for a better opportunity to come along. Go out there and pick up some applications to every corner, department and book store, every coffee shop, every dine in restaurant. It may not be the greatest job in the world, but hey it gets you out of the house and puts a little extra money in your pocket.

When your not at work, keep up with the activities you currently partake in. Continue to send out resumes to an actual career and spend time with your child and grandparents. With a part time job added to your to do list, it'll take up a good chunk of that free time and get you out of the house. It's like my father use to tell me, there's nothing wrong with settling for something small until a bigger opportunity shows up.

The key here will be filling out plenty of applications and calling the places back regularly. If someone hasn't gotten back to you after a week, you call them and ask them what's going on. Be persistent, it always pays off. I hope that's enough to help you out, if not just ask me again

[Gadreille]

Actually, I have been doing exactly what you suggested. Most places won't hire me because I'm "Overqualified". I perhaps I could try and be more persistant than I already am, but it is very out of character of me and difficult to keep up.

I suppose the application process is work in itself though...its just another mundane, repetitive task. If I could land the job I agree 100% it would make me feel better. I just can't land one!

[Lucian 'The Wolf' Harth]

Well darn I was hoping I'd be a little more helpful than that. I'm sorry I couldn't be more of a help to you, but yeah just keep at it and I'm sure you'll find a job somewhere. You could try not listing all of your schooling on your applications, maybe that would prevent the over qualification.

[Gadreille]

Haha its alright, I knew it was a stretch to ask, and in all honesty I could be more persistant, it's just difficult for me to be as aggressive as some people suggest I be. I have had people suggest not listing my schooling, and honestly I've thought about it, but for two problems:

One, I can never lie so if someone asked me about my schooling, I would tell them the truth.

Two, I'm too proud. I don't want to hide something I worked my ass off for. Haha, not that this is a good reason, but its a truthful one.

[Lucian 'The Wolf' Harth]

Well I can definately respect your honesty, but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do to get a job. I know when I was looking for one I was out every day filling out applications, then when I got home I called places I put applications in to the day before.

[Gadreille]

Its not that I can't lie, like its a rule or something. It's that I am incapable of lying. It just...doesn't work. No puh-puh-puh poker face. (bad Lady Gaga reference FTW)

Calling is the hard part for me. Who do you ask for when you call places? Hiring manager? Just manager?

[Guest]

What kind of job are you applying for and where? That makes a difference. My dad was stuck in that position as well. He wants to be an engineer, but is so experienced that they all think he should be in management. I am going to visit my college's career center (they get people hired) so I can probably help with the resume if you need.

[xraineyesx]

Hey Lucian: I gotta problem for you to solve.

I'll keep it short and simple: I want to take a semester off of school to basically bust my ass, save up some money, and get all my shit straight and whatnot. I even might take some classes at one of the local colleges or ed places or whatever, just to keep up with my cores (I go to a liberal arts school.)

Everyone says this is a shitty idea.

I think they're wrong.

Basically, I'm doing it anyway, but I don't know how to convince people (especially my parents and my best friend at school) that I know what I'm doing, that I'm not stupid, that I'm not quitting school, and that they should respect my decision.

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