As I Look Into Your Eyes (a poem about Hatred and what it breeds)

[Ylanne Abdul Saleeb]

What do you see
When you look at me?
No
Wrong Question
What do I see
When your heart is full of hate
What do I feel
As the abhorrence stretches
Catching the Muslim
Burning the black man
Shooting the Christian
Killing the Jew
Torturing the woman
Abusing the child
Poisoning those
Whom you do not understand
Because you fear what is different

The gun barrel is cold
Icy against my skin
The ropes burn against the flesh of my hands
I listen to your voice
As you tell me what I've done wrong
You tell me it is my time
But I have committed no crime

Except to love
To save and to protect
Those who were objects of your hate
No those who ARE objects of it
To tell you to your face
That no one deserves to die
To tell you to your face
That every one you killed tonight
Surely shall rejoice in Paradise
While you will suffer in flames

Your eyes they burn bright
It is with Satan's fire they do so
And trying as you might
Hatred coils outward
Like a venomous snake
You pounce
You hiss and pace
Dark eyes smoldering
Before going out
Turning to ice
Freezing the blood in my veins
Colder than dry ice

Your voice changes
Thunders, rumbling mighty
Deafening in my ears
Whispers curses, threats
I am all-aware
You speak to me, to me
Your intended victim to-night

You pray loud and clear
For all around to hear
"Father God
Strike this one down with Your wrath
Poured out with fire
Upon the one who dared
To question Your holy sovereignty!"
Omein

Leering eyes
Staring, peering
Can't help not caring
Closing in
From within
All around
Comes the sound
Surrounding me

Taunts, jeers, threats
Laughter

As I look into your eyes
Hatred glowing fierce
I ask you
For one last dying request
You hesitate
Nod

I drop to my knees
"God, Lord in Heaven,
Forgive this one
And forgive me
Let this one know Your love"

Enough!
Enough!
It is enough!
You cry
Silence!

You summarize the list
Of my nonexistent crimes
You smile
Exuberance flowing all through you
Hatred, Hatred, Hatred
I feel it pulsing in the air
Beating to the beat of my heart

I stare down the gun barrel,
Black as death
Streaked with rain
Falling continuously

I feel anger welling up inside
But I push it aside
Willing myself
To accept this fate
My death-on account of hate

You seem more confident
Than ever before
You look right into my eyes
I see yours
They are a light brown
With streaks of darker tints
Highlighting your dilated pupil
They are simmering with rage
Overflowing with hate
As I look into your eyes

Your trigger finger moves
I am still
Completely still
And you pull the trigger

There is a blinding flash
And all turns black
The last thing I see

Your eyes...
Weedy, thrushy brown
Softer they might have been
If Hate hadn't crept in
You look at me
Right through me
But you see nothing
Except someone you hate
Someone you've come here to kill
I am not a person
Not anymore
Not to you
I am the object of your hate

I find it within me
The gift of God's grace
And to your abject horror
I offer you a parting smile
As I fall
My blood
Staining the ground
Where I lie

My world goes white
I am free at last