Let's Write a Letter!

[Gunneh]

Here's how you do it:

Dear (someone you recently talked to),
I don't really know how to tell you this, but (*1*). I think I realized it (*2*)(*3*) and I saw you (*4*)(*5*). I'm sure you're (*6*) enough to understand (*7*). I'm returning (*8*) to you, but I'll keep (*9*) as a memory. You should also know that I (*10*) and (*11*).
(12),
(Your name)
then tag 10 people

1) What's the color of your shirt?
Blue - I'm in love with your cat
Red - Our affair is over
White - I’m joining the Convent
Black -Our romance is over
Green- Our socks don't match
Grey - You're a leprechaun
Yellow - I'm selling myself for candy
Pink - Your nostrils are insulting
Brown - The mafia wants you
No shirt - Purple hedgehogs want to destroy you
Other -I dislike your eyelashes

2) Which is your birth month?
January - That night you picked your nose
February -When I quoted Forest Gump
March - When your dwarf bit me
April - When I tripped on peanut butter
May - When I finally changed my underwear
June - When you put cuffs on me
July – When I saw the purple monkey
August - When you smacked my butt
September - Last year when you peed your pants
October - When we skinny dipped in the bathtub
November - When your dog humped my leg
December - When I threw up in your sock drawer

3) Which food do you prefer?
Tacos - In your apartment
Chicken- In your car
Pasta - Outside of your office
Hamburgers - Under the bus
Salad – As you were eating Kraft Dinner
Lasagna - Outside the mental hospital
Kebab - With Jean Chrétien
Seafood - In your closet
Sandwiches - At the Elton John concert
Pizza - At the Mental Hospital
Hot dog - Under a street light
Annat- With George Bush and Stephen Harper

4) What's the color of your socks?
Yellow - Ignore
Red - Put whipped cream on
Black - Hit on
Blue - Knock out
Purple - Pour syrup on
White - Carve your initials into
Grey - Pull the clothes off
Brown - bite off
Orange - Castrate
Pink - Pull the pants off of
Barefoot - Sit on
Other - Drive over

5) What's the color of your underwear?
Black - My boyfriend
White - My father
Grey – The Catholic Priest
Brown – The Montreal Canadian’s goalie
Purple - My corned beef hash
Red – My knee caps
Blue - My salt-beef bucket
Yellow - My illegitimate child in Ghana
Orange - My Blink 182 cd
Pink – Your ‘My Little Pony’ collection
Other --The elephant in the corner

6) What do you prefer to watch on TV?
One Tree Hill - Senile
Heroes- Frostbitten
Lost - High
Simpsons- Cowardly
The news - Scarred
American Idol - Masochistic
Family Guy - Open
Top Model - Middle-class
Annat -shamed

7) Your mood right now?
Happy - How awful you are
Sad - How boring you are
Bored - That I get turned on only by garbage men
Angry - That your smell makes me vomit
Depressed – That we’re related
Excited - That I may pee my pants
Nervous - The middle-east is planning their revenge on you
Worried - That your Ford sucks
Apathetic - That you need a sex-change
Silly - That I'm allergic to your earlobes
Sleepy - That Santa doesn't exist
Ashamed - That there is no solution to you being a dumb kid
Other - That your driving sucks

What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?
Grey - Your toe ring
Yellow - Your love letters to me
Red - The pictures from Vegas
Black - Your pet rock
Blue - The couch cushions
Green - Your car
Orange - Your false teeth
Brown - Your nose hair clippers
White - Our matching snoopy underwear
Purple - Your old New Kids on the Block blanket
Pink - The cut toenails
Other - Your Hannah Montana underwear

9) The first letter of your first name?
A/B - Your neighbours dog
C/D - Your photo with the mustache drawn on it
E/F - My virginity
G/H - The oil tank from your car
I/J - Your left ear
K/L - The results of that blood-sample
M/N - Your glass eye
O/P - My common sense
Q/R - Your mom
S/T - Your collection of butterflies
U/V - Your criminal record
W/X – Your sucide note
Y/Z - Your credit cards

10) The last letter in your last name?
A/B - Love your sweet, sweet butt
C/D - Always will remember the pep talks
E/F -Never will forget that night
G/H – Will not tell the authorities that you stole the whale from the backyard.
I/J – Mocked you behind your back constantly
K/L - Hate your cooking
M/N - Told in my confession today about the moose poaching
O/P - Told my psychiatrist about the bruises
Q/R - Get sick when I think of your feet
S/T - Always wanted to break your legs
U/V - Will try to forget that you broke my heart
W/X - Am better off without you
Y/Z – haven't showered in a month

11) What do you prefer to drink?
Wine- Our friendship is ruined
Soft drink – I’m off to lead a new life as a lemon
Soda – I will haunt you when I’m reincarnated as an Eskimo
Milk - The apartment building is on fire
Water – I'm scratching my butt as you read this
Cider– I have a passionate interest for mice
Juice – You ruined my attempts at another world war.
Snapple/Vitamin water – You should get that embarrassing rash checked out
Hot chocolate – Your Cucumber-fetishism is weird
Whiskey - I love Oprah Winfrey
Beer – I threw up yesterday
Other – you should stop picking your nose

12) To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?
Thailand – Greetings to your frog, Leonard
Australia - best of luck on the sex change
France - Love always
Spain - With tears of sadness
China – You make me sick
Germany – Please don’t hurt me
Japan - Go milk a cow
Greece - Your everlasting enemy
USA - Warm tingly sensations
Egypt – Kiss my butt
England - Go drown

Now I'll start


Dear Hayley,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but purple hedgehogs want to destroy you. I think I realized it when I tripped on peanut butter outside of the mental hospital and I saw you sit on my salt-beef bucket. I'm sure you're open enough to understand that Santa doesn’t exist. I'm returning your nose hair clippers to you, but I'll keep your left ear as a memory. You should also know that I haven’t showered in a month and I’m off to lead a new life as a lemon.

Go drown,
Jesse

[Guest]

Dear Hillman,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but I dislike your eyelashes. I think I realized it when I finally changed my underwear in your apartment and I saw you sit on the elephant in the corner. I'm sure you're scarred enough to understand the middle-east is planning their revenge on you. I'm returning the couch cushions to you, but I'll keep my virginity as a memory. You should also know that I always will remember the pep talks and I'm scratching my butt as you read this.
Go drown,
Felicia

[Silvan Arrow]

Dear Erik,

I don’t really know how to tell you this, but I’m in love with your cat. I think I realized it that night you picked your nose outside of your office and I saw you sit on my salt-beef bucket. I’m sure you’re scarred enough to understand how awful you are. I’m returning your nose hair clippers to you, but I’ll keep your photo with the mustache drawn on it as a memory. You should also know that I get sick when I think of your feet and I’m scratching my butt as you read this.

Your everlasting enemy,
Carly

(By the way, this whole game is simply amazing )

[SpaceWheeler2.0]

Dear Kate,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but our affair is over. I think I realized it when we skinny dipped in the bathtub at the Mental Hospital and I saw you carve your initials into my father. I'm sure you're scarred enough to understand that you need a sex-change. I'm returning our matching snoopy underwear to you, but I'll keep your collection of butterflies as a memory. You should also know that I told in my confession today about the moose poaching and you ruined my attempts at another world war.

Best of luck on the sex change,

Steven

(Pure chance that the sex-change comment went round to the end )

[Kalon Ordona II]

Dear Dwayne,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but I dislike your eyelashes. I think I realized it when your dog humped my leg at the Elton John concert and I saw you sit on my father. I'm sure you're scarred enough to understand that your driving sucks. I'm returning our matching snoopy underwear to you, but I'll keep your glass eye as a memory. You should also know that I told in my confession today about the moose poaching and you should stop picking your nose.

Go milk a cow,
Michael

[wakeangel]

Dear Leo (UnfortunateBountyHunter),
I don't really know how to tell you this, but I dislike your eyelashes and our romance is over. I think I realized it last year when you peed your pants outside your office and I saw you knock out and carve you initials into the Catholic priest. I'm sure you're frost-bitten enough to understand that your Ford sucks. I'm returning our matching Snoopy underwear to you (disturbing! XD), but I'll keep your photo with a mustache drawn on it as a memory. You should also know that I love your sweet, sweet butt and you ruined my attempts at another world war.
Kiss my butt,
Danyella

(Wow. This came out so so wrong. Leo is my son. XD)

[Gadreille]

Dear Joshua,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but our affair is over. I think I realized it when we skinny dipped in the bathtub in your apartment and I saw you sit on the catholic priest. I'm sure you're high enough to understand the middle-east is planning their revenge on you. I'm returning our matching snoopy underwear to you, but I'll keep your neighbor's dog as a memory. You should also know that I haven't showered in a month and you should stop picking your nose.

Kiss my butt,
Brenna

[UnfortunateBountyHunter]

Dear Curtis,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but Our socks don't match. I think I realized it When you put cuffs on me under a street light and I saw you Pour syrup on Your ‘My Little Pony’ collection. I'm sure you're Cowardly enough to understand The middle-east is planning their revenge on you . I'm returning The pictures from Vegas to you, but I'll keep The results of that blood-sample as a memory. You should also know that I Hate your cooking and I will haunt you when I’m reincarnated as an Eskimo.
Your everlasting enemy,
Leo

[Guest]

Dear Brenna,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but our romance is over. I think I realized it last year when you peed your pants outside the mental hospital and I saw you carve your initials into my salt-beef bucket. I'm sure you're high enough to understand that your driving sucks. I'm returning our matching snoopy underwear to you, but I'll keep your left ear as a memory. You should also know that I haven't showered in a month and you should stop picking your nose.
Go milk a cow,
Joshua

[Aya MacArthur]

Dear Gunneh,

I don’t really know how to tell you this, but I’m joining the Convent. I think I realized it when you put cuffs on me in your closet and saw you hit on my boyfriend. I’m sure you’re open enough to understand that I’m allergic to your earlobes. I’m returning the couch cushions to you, but I’ll keep your criminal record as a memory. You should know that I get sick when I think of your feet and you should get that embarrassing rash checked out.

Your Everlasting Enemy

Vivian

[Shekinah]

Dear Marieke,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but you're a leprechaun. I think I realized it when we skinny dipped in the bathtub in your closet and I saw you sit on my father. I'm sure you're high enough to understand that I get turned on only by garbage men. I'm returning your toe ring and the pictures from Vegas to you, but I'll keep the results of that blood-sample as a memory. You should also know that I told in my confession today about the moose poaching and you ruined my attempts at another world war.

Go milk a cow.

Shekinah

[Aya MacArthur]

Dear Mel,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but our affair is over. I think I realized it when you put cuffs on me in your closet and I saw you sit on your "My Little Pony" collection. I'm sure you're open enough to understand that I get turned on by garbage men. I'm returning our matching snoopy underwear to you, but I'll keep your criminal record as a memory. You should also know that I mocked you behind your back constantly and you should get that embarrassing rash checked out.

Kiss my butt,
Aya

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